“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” - Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul
“Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.” - John Greenleaf Whittier, Maud Muller - Pamphlet
I used two quotes for today’s Motivation Monday, because they both speak to me in unison. I’ve just moved from my home of 22-years to a new state by myself about 3 months ago and everything is new to me. I am a creature of habit, but having all new surroundings it’s a pretty good bet there’s nothing familiar enough to form any type of habit. When you graduate you go where the job is, regardless of whatever is happening where you are at the time. That’s where the John Whittier quote comes in. Sometimes I think of all the things and people I left behind and it’s hard. You think of all the things that could have been, if only… For a while I just kept going back every weekend, but it didn’t help. At the end of the day I had moved and my life was developing somewhere else. Everything I’d known and established until that point had to be left behind.
It’s hard. Honest to God I don’t lie to you when I say its super difficult. I had never paid a bill in my life until this moment. I had to learn to budget my money, make time in my schedule to maintain my new home, I’m in grad school so I had to learn how the dynamics of that worked, I had to learn how to make friends without the comfort of education (high school/college/etc. – still working on it lol), and I took on my first full-time 45 hour a week job. It’s really scary and your instinct is to just run from it. Go back home and just hide from it. Eventually though you start to get your bearings and you start to manage your time and money better. Things stop seeming so impossible. You go from worrying about losing your friends to realizing if they are really your friends they aren’t going anywhere. You go from dreading the move to loving the atmosphere. Everything just starts to fall into place.
To be honest, this was the last place I thought I’d be. I remember telling my mom I absolutely was not going to do it, but here I am. This is the best opportunity and the best place for me right now. “I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” You don’t realize when life is changing so fast in a way you didn’t expect that it could possibly be good. In the moment you just focus on how much of a disaster it is, because it’s a deviation from your original plan. What we fail to realize is that we don’t make our destiny. We don’t assign the plans. We have no control over anything and if we step back and look at where we came from to where we are now we realize things happened exactly as they should have. As long as we live our lives’ right and with a purpose positive results will happen on a much larger scale, even when they seem negative at the time. So wake up each day and work towards your goal. Don’t sweat the small day-to-day struggles, but focus on the long-term triumphs. Although you may not forget what might have been, realize it’s in the past for a reason. And as always……Be You.
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